Rachel Appears to be Musical Prodigy, Isn't.

Rachel Appears to be Musical Prodigy, Isn't.

Musical prodigies are said to look this amazing. And have ferrets.

Japan is an amazing place in that it creates mental images for me that make me laugh uncontrollably in the teacher’s room…

Megan and I were talking today while I was studying (online, obviously) and I told her that the Vice Principal had asked me to play the piano for the teacher’s farewell ceremony on Tuesday. I pointed to myself to confirm this, and then mentioned that I may not be a good choice as I have no idea how to play the piano at all. He then nodded, said “Hm. Is there no one who will play?” (Meaning I was definitely his last choice), and then he kindly instructed me on how to hole punch papers and put them in folders. That man sure puts the ‘pal’ in principal.

Anyway, I told Megan about the piano playing. She thought it was funny enough. I then said that I should have agreed and played the piano and played chopsticks. Megan said it would have been better to just bangon the keys for six minutes and then stand up and say, “It’s an American song!”. I had the mental image of every person in the room standing perfectly still -- not laughing or acknowledging my hypothetical insane actions. I then burst out laughing in the middle of the teacher’s room. Laughing so hard that my JTE actually asked me what was so funny. I told her the idea, and she started laughing soon. I then said, “Everyone would just say ああ、面白い。。。“ Which means “Ah… that’s interesting.” – they say that all the time when they don’t like something. LOVE IT.

I have absolutely nothing left to talk about, that seemed like it was completely validated.

Sumo Wrestlers hold Championship, are Fat.

Sumo Wrestlers hold Championship, are Fat.

As I got off the subway at Namba Station in Osaka, I thought, ‘what could possibly be so wonderful about fat guys in thongs wrestling each other out of a circle?’ The answer is, ‘everything’. The lot of us (my friends plus KAJET people—an organization that sets up events such as this one for everyone in the prefecture) crowded into some tiny seats around the ring. Many of the foreigners I was with had trouble with the size of the seats, but they did their best to squeeze into them. The sumo match started off with lesser players (I don’t know any sports terms so please bear with me). The group of sumo-san come out and ascend the stage as their names are called out. When the entire group has been called out, they clap their hands and lift them to the sky while standing in a circle. Then everyone cheers, and they waddle off stage. During this opening, the sumo-san will wear sort of flags of their sponsors over their nether regions.

The fighting was the most exciting part, although it is the briefest part of the match. First the sumo-san have to approach the stage. A man in a very old, oriental looking get-up sings to a fan (someone told me that he sings their names). Sumo-san then climb up into the circle, face each other, and lift their legs high in the air, stomping them to the ground. The crowd yells ‘yoisho!’ Then the sumo squat, have some towels brought to them, squat some more, throw salt around the arena (to cleanse)… eventually they face each other and the match begins. The goal, from what I understand, is for one wrestler to toss/shimmy/push/elbow the other one out of the circle of chalk that surrounds them. Sometimes the matches are really quick, sometimes they are very long (by long I mean almost a minute). We saw wrestlers pick up their opponents and chuck them out of the ring, or fall trying to do so. We saw slap fights! Some sumo would grapple with each other then takes breaks while hugging, which was odd. The most exciting part of this is that the sumo wrestlers look to be about 300-400 pounds. When a 350 pound man in a diaper is tossed out of a ring, it is INCREDIBLE. Boy, some of those men took some real tumbles.

I also want to mention that the majority of watching the matches was mostly chatting, with brief pauses to return to the action. Megan and I began to rename the sumo wrestlers and take bets on them. ‘I call the one in the aqua diaper! His name will be Bel’aqua!’ “Alright… then I want the one in the CRIMSON diaper. I will name him Noodles.” Megan made much better choices than I did.

I was interested in some of the wrestlers who weren’t Japanese. The top sumo wrestler (who won this match among many others in the past few years) is Mongolian. We also saw a Russian sumo, a Romanian sumo, and a Hungarian one, I believe. It was really strange seeing them dressed as sumo. I don’t know who pulled off the diaper better, the Asians or the Caucasians.

In the end, I highly recommend taking in a sumo match at least once in your life. I believe alcohol might make it even more exciting, although I don’t have that as first hand experience.

Teachers Prepare for Migration

Migration of the Teachers: Part I – Preliminaries

It’s the last full week of school (if you don’t count Vernal Equinox… a stupid idea for a holiday but a grand idea for a day off!) The teachers are finding out over the phone whether or not they will be working at their respective schools for the next school year. Many of them won’t be. Oddly enough (and happily for me) quite a few of the teachers are swapping from Honjo to Ine, and from Ine to Honjo. This means I won’t be devoid of their smiling faces or strange conversations. It’s good that I am able to keep the people I know, as they are few and far between.

However, as I had prepared myself for, my most fluent JTE, Tsuji-sensei, will be leaving me. She has tears in her eyes this morning… I think that while she is happy with the news, she is going to be fairly heartbroken when she leaves this school and this little community. Tsuji-sensei came to Honjo JHS six years ago. I believe she was fresh out of college, where she majored in French and learned English on the side. As such, she is certified to instruct both English and French. I have to mention that her English is phenomenal. For someone who has learned English solely inside of Japanese Universities, her skill and the level of conversation she has progressed to is top notch. She says this is because her former university professor is British. Be that as it may, it was always a breath of fresh air speaking with Tsuji-sensei. I honestly feel sometimes that she is the only person who can understand me (as an English speaker and as a person) in this town. In the summer that brought me to Japan, Tsuji-sensei married her boyfriend. Her boyfriend, also Tsuji-sensei, worked at the elementary school in Honjo for some years. He currently works in Kyoto city with handicapped learners. This means that the Tsujis are married and live about three hours of driving apart, which also means that Mrs. Tsuji (my JTE) travels to Kyoto city almost every weekend (read: every weekend she is not at work).

So, for her, transferring is a great relief. Wherever she is sent, odds are it will be infinitely closer than where she is now. Honjo is so distant from the city our prefecture is named after that people in Shiga, Hyogo, Fukui, and Osaka are able to reach it must faster. One hopes that she will actually be able to live with her husband at some point, too. I suppose she’d like that as well!

In the next few weeks I will have to say goodbye to a lot of my colleagues. I suppose the only consolation is knowing that the teachers are generally better off where they are in comparison to Honjo or Ine. Also, in early April we will be receiving the new first years (fresh out of elementary school), which will be my new breath of fresh air.

Last day at Ine JHS for the Year, Keima Came

Last day of classes at Ine JHS! I am celebrating the break from having to teach my horrid 2nd year students. Here is a picture of the first year students. I actually like them. I managed to convince them of the pronunciation of ‘came’ by writing on the board,

• Keima came.

Giggle aside (in my head), Keima blushed, and the students learned. In theory. Also, it was cold again this morning. I was not amused.

Bet you can't guess which one is me.

St. Patrick’s Day Acknowledged, Rachel Forgets Anyway.

Today was St. Patrick’s day. In actual news, I had my last first year class at Honjo JHS, so I took a picture.

Then I talked to John wot comes from Oirland, so I suppose I celebrated the holiday in that fashion. I then knitted and fell asleep while watching Amelie.

Not to flood my blog with even MORE photos, but I went cycling around Honjo-hama (the area behind my house, essentially) and some of the photos came out looking very stunning. Despite my taking them.

Curry is Always in Season

Leigh and Simon enjoying their donuts and drinks. Simultaneously.

Not much to report, other than curry is delicious. Here are some pictures of my adoring public at Mister Donut.

Jun and I enjoy donut... bags.

Rachel cleans kitchen, Hell freezes over.

I was supposed to attend the fertility festival in Nagoya this weekend, but instead elected to stay home and clean my house. Now that the weather has changed from miserable to considerably-less-miserable, I find myself able to walk around my house without a million layers. I also find myself going around my first floor more frequently than the past two months. I use my kitchen sometimes, and I’ve even started sitting in the tatami rooms once more! It’s nice to have my house back, and Kirby agrees. He’s become quite the butterball after a winter of sleeping in a hammock and eating ferret cheerios without running around very often.

Kirby and I got some exercise on Saturday! I worked out and went for a bike ride, which I haven’t done a lot lately. Not feeling as sore as I expected to be, I deep cleaned my kitchen, put away the kotatsu covers, and set up my tatami room with some floral arrangements! I also bug repelled my entire house with two kinds of repellent. My pesticide still stands by at the genkan, waiting for its time to shine in the not-too-distant future. The spider sacs, still swaying gently in the breeze on my porches, have been sprayed with pesticide. I was a bit of a weenie about going out onto the porch to do it, but I held my breath, counted to 10 and danced around in fear while spraying each of them lovingly.

Leigh came over in the evening to watch student films with me. The mark of a true friend.

Graduation Ceremony Day, Some People Care

Today was White Day. This is the day where girls get chocolate from boys. I didn’t, but I did go to a graduation at Ine JHS. There isn’t much to say about it. Teachers dressed up in suits (which helped me to realize that I need to reintroduce exercise into my daily regiment), students wore their same old school uniforms (with pretty red flowers attached), and parents showed up in suits or kimonos! We also had a group of important looking men show up, as is necessary for most Japanese ceremonies, I feel. One of them was the mayor, as it turns out! La-dee-da!

The ceremony itself was about an hour and a half in length. Speeches, bowing, formalities, and then we got to leave. Short and sweet! It was cute seeing my students with their parents, and cuter still watching them enter the teacher’s room one by one to say, ‘thank you!’ and dash out, embarrassed and a bit teary.

I felt lucky to spend the day at Ine JHS on a Friday instead of my usual schedule of going over to sit around at the BOE and twiddle my thumbs. I was also very fortunate in that I got to take food home from the 3rd year graduation party! I grabbed some sushi and sandwiches before heading down to Scott’s apartment to watch movies with Leigh. A good day by all accounts.

I also managed to take some interesting pictures of my town – proof that the weather is actually getting nicer.

一日中泣きました。 I cried the whole day.

Today was the 'sayonara' party for the 3rd years at Honjo JHS! In celebration of their three years at middle school, we played dodge ball and had ourselves a picnic lunch (in the meeting room).

The first years put on a quiz for everyone! They switched clothes and unbuttoned buttons and moved around hairstyles and the rest of us had to guess what was different! The second years presented 'teacher trivia' and asked questions such as;

What is Kyoto-sensei's favourite colour? (Vice Principal)
How old is Rachel-sensei?
What is Mr. Nishimura's hobby?

Finally there was a drawing contest involving all the grades! The student council announced something that the contestants had to draw. Such as, "the world", "Amanohashidate", "Doraemon", "Yoshi", and a few more that I can't remember. The students would display their works and the teachers (and Rachel) decided whose was the best!

The downer of the day was that my JTE's grandfather passed away and she had to leave school to go home. Not only is it a bummer to have someone in your family die, but she also had to miss a day that she'd really worked hard for and looked forward to all week! It seemed really unfair to me.

The last event of the day was in the music room. The whole school (easily 65 people) sat down and watched a slide show of pictures throughout the school years of the current 3rd year students. It began with pictures of them as first years and showed all the activities they'd taken part of. It was a really cute presentation! Afterwards, it was time for the teachers to deliver their personal messages to each individual student. There are only nine third year students (even I can name them all off with ease), so it was very personal.

Each teacher chose a student they were close to and wrote them something to the effect of, "You've become a leader/You've shown such prowess through the years./I remember when you first came to school..." and so on. I was again bummed that Tsuji-sensei wasn't around to read her passage to Kenta. She teaches the two slow-learner students for homeroom (which is mainly kanji, as I understand it). She and Kenta are really close and it was a shame she wasn't there. Anyway, all it took was a single crack in the music teacher's voice and all stoicness in the room was gone. The rest of the female teachers began to crack and tear up when they read out their passages. This led to the female students beginning to tear up and sniffle. In five minutes there wasn't a man, woman or child in that room who wasn't crying. It was one of the most emotional times I've ever had, I don't even know how to explain why. How can something feel like too much when it doesn't seem like enough? I don't even speak Japanese well enough to understand what's being said, but I understand enough, I suppose. For me, my breaking point was looking across the room and seeing Hayato, the captain of the baseball team in tears. Not just tears in his eyes, but steaming down his cheeks. He wasn't holding back, he was done. All the boys were crying -- and I couldn't stop after that. These kids bike in the ice cold winter for MILES around! They are up from dawn until dusk working their asses off at school, sports, and on their studies -- not to mention household chores! I couldn't believe the amount of emotion in that room, it was almost unbearable. After the teachers sang a song to the students, it was time for the 3rd years to deliver their messages to the first and second year students. The kids got it together (bleary eyed as they were) and said encouraging words of advise to the other students. Then the second to last girl, Sayaka, the QUIETEST girl in the school began to read hers and just BURST into tears. Hysterical sobs. She couldn't finish for a good two minutes. It was awkward, and everyone else started to tear up again. Anyway, we got through it.

Fifteen minutes later I was walking to my car and couldn't hold back any longer. I started crying and I didn't stop for a good two hours. I couldn't even tell you what I was crying about.

To take my mind off whatever it was that was making me feel more and more helpless and uncomfortable, I took a drive around the high cliffs which border the coast of the Sea of Japan. Thank God for the sea, that's all I have to say about that.

Kenta! He is the disabled learner of his grade -- but he got into HS! Wahoo!

Dinner at the Boss’ house, Reminder that I don’t speak Japanese.

The other night I went to a dinner at Hamano-san’s house. Hamano-san is the Head of the Board of Education in Ine. So, his title is 教育長 (Kyoiku-cho). I went accompanied by Miyajima-sensei (the music/cooking teacher at Honjo JHS), Akiyama-sensei (the nurse/everyone’s second mother), and Tsuji-sensei (my partner in crime and JTE). We met the Hamanos at their lovely home in Tsutsukawa, which is one of the many villages that makes up Ine-town. Their house was old and beautiful, but decorated with the Japanese luxuries of life (large flat screen televisions, couches, cuckoo clocks, stuffed toys and other things Japanese people like more than most).

Dinner was ‘inoshishi nabe’, which was wild boar meat cooked nabe-style, in a large hot pot! We mixed it with miso dashi (the main sauce ingredient which the meat and vegetables are cooked in), mushrooms, onions, cabbage etc.


The evening, for me, was spent trying not to get drunk as Hamano-san kept refilling my beer, and then his own. I also tried my best to understand what everyone else was talking about. However, the TV was on and distracted me greatly throughout most of the meal. By the end of it (three hours later), Tsuji-sensei and I drove back to Honjo JHS to get my car. She asked me if I had been watching the TV. I hesitantly told her that I had, and was embarrassed if it was very obvious. She mentioned that she had been watching too, and wanted to know the outcome of the game show. I told her that the other guy had missed his alarm, so Shinji had won the 1,000,000 yen.

Bike.

Here is a filler (probably the definition of filler) wot I wrote for the ganbatte times. It is not good, but it saves me the time of writing about my new bike. 読んで。I put it in courier font so it looks like I typed it for the Daily Planet.


The Adventures of Otoshita Kagi
Rachel K. Sreebny


Most people come to understand their lives after near death experiences, torrid affairs, or on their deathbeds (at least, this is what TV and movies have taught me). However, for me to realize the bizarre state of my life in Japan after six months in Ine-town, it simply required me to drop my brand new bike keys through the sewer grate.

My brand new bike is what the locals call ‘enji-iro’, which roughly translates to, ‘the color of a Dr. Pepper can”. It has three speeds, a basket, a bell, and a crazy Japanese bike lock, which I am only beginning to understand. The last bike I owned was a purple Huffy. It had magenta, pink and white streamers that danced in the breeze (much akin to Freddie the leaf), and some neat, neon-coloured rubber things made for bicycle spokes (as was the style in 1992). My bike, as I remember it, had a kickstand. When I wanted to abandon my bike for the day, I would simply pull the kickstand down and lean the bike on it. No problems there – I was quite the clever 2nd grader.

I was feeling fairly accomplished having spoken to the delivery man over the phone and directing him to my apartment (as many know is almost impossible to find amongst the monkey-infested forests of Upstate Tango). The idea of riding a bike again sounded lovely, and was part of my growing denial of the cold, cold weather. Certainly if I purchase a bicycle, wear spring clothing, and never turn on my heat, the weather will change accordingly. The bike arrived, and I hurried to unpack it from its meticulous Japanese wrapping. I quickly understood how to lock and unlike the bike with the keys. I pushed the bike stand up over the wheel, but couldn’t seem to get it all the way back down. As I was jimmying (Yankee term to mean ‘fiddling with’) the swinging bike stand, the key leapt out of the locked part of the bike and fell straight through the gutter into the muck below.

Two minutes, a potted plant hook, meter stick, knitting needle and scotch tape later – I had fashioned a mighty tool! A tool with which I hoped to procure my bicycle keys! Crouched down on my stoop in my school clothes (knee socks and all…), I came to the realization that this tool I had so carefully fashioned, I considered how lucky it was to drop my keys at the end of winter. The knowledge that I may not bump into the Jurassic insects that surround my home during the more formidable months helped me to continue my efforts of poking around in the muck and the mire. However, my tool was as efficient as the insulation in my house. I switched to the undeniable power of the garden shovel, which failed almost as immediately. Finally (and adhering to the rule of thirds), I acquired my keys by using my broom and dustpan. It was no simple task, but I had ganbatte’d and succeeded –a hero for the ages.

Disinfecting my keys in the kitchen sink, I thought about the evening’s events. Living in Japan is no small feat, but in this program I often feel that I never have to do anything on my own. My lack of language skills paired with my predecessor’s overly “independent” actions have led me to a lifestyle of sitting pretty, while lovely Japanese office workers manage my life. Doing so very little for myself on a daily basis, it was nice to feel accomplished – even in the simple actions of retrieving lost keys, ordering a bike over the phone, or realizing that the disinfectant I was using is actually lilac-scented fabric softener. I suppose without those small, household disasters, I would forget entirely how to do things on my own.

Perhaps it’s not the Michael Bay climax-style realization I made it out to be. If the reader finds him or herself unsatisfied, please also note that I made a cheese omelet afterwards, and that it was delicious.

Another weekend in the cities

Friday night after driving down from Tango with Leigh, I joined Megan and her buddy Kelly in Kameoka for the evening. After much ado about losing an expensive, cult item -- tortillas were made by the semi-Mexican Kelly (and consumed by all).

Saturday I went to Osaka with Ian and Kelly. I had my rolling suitcase with me because inside it was my semi-broken iMac! Rolling that around was far easier than taking it in the original box. Also, I looked even more like a tourist than usual! Always a plus. We arrived at the Osaka Apple Store! With the help of Ian and Kelly, I managed to describe the computer problems to our helpful 'genius', and he whisked it away for repairs. I will be picking it up in two weeks time, and hoping meanwhile that they are fixing all the right problems! It would be really nice to have an electronic escape weapon for those long afternoons after school...
With some serendipity going on, I ran into Anthony on the train to Osaka, Simon and Lyle around the Shinsaibashi area, and Lauren O. with a bunch of gaijin buddies not long after. After a while, the three of us (tryst, if you will) met up with Megan and her friend Doug of Gifu.

We all had dinner and drinks at the Outback Steakhouse. Outback in Osaka is kind of like Disneyland for English teachers in Kansai -- I don't honestly know why. Our kindly server, Yuri, managed to put up with us for 2+ hours as we drank too much beer, ate too much meat (why did I order so much, again?) and booby-trapped Ian's plate with sauce.

After an amusing train ride back to Kameoka, we left Ian for dead and sang lots of Japanese songs at karaoke. As to say, the three of them did and I drank cocoa! I also sang me some "Dust in the Wind" because I was tired and it was the only song I could manage. Accompanied by Kelly's crunking. The perfect evening.

Sunday
Sunday was mostly laziness. Megan, Doug and I dropped Kelly off at Kyoto station and went down to the Sanjo/Teramachi area to walk around the river. It was a beautiful day! Families were out enjoying recreation, the birds were enjoying the sky (from what I could see), and there were heron everywhere! I tried to take some pictures... mostly the day was so pretty it was hard to take a bad picture, but I believe I managed. I also remember that we had Indian food with Amy, Ian and Lauren as well and that it was delicious. I did, however, have a fabulous late night road trip back to Tango with Leigh and we caught up on our weekends!

Odorii Heppubaan

Reicheru, Reicheru. Ano... Odori Hapbaan wakaru?
Rachel -- do you know the Odori Hapbaan?

'....What?'

This went on. Only it went through different volumes and speeds
ODORI HAPBAAN
OOOOOODOOOOORIIIIII HAAAAAPUUUUUBAAAAAAAAAAAN
odorihapubaan! odorihapubaan!!!!!

Saa.... hatsuon wakaranaikedo... 'Damn, she doesn't understand our pronunciation"
"Sorry, sensei, I really really don't"

"Reicheru, you know, ROMAA HORIDEI?"

oh.

Audrey Hepburn. The female, American actress (none of these words were used in Japaense, mind you) -- someone SUCKS at taboo.

Then they laughed at how I said her name and asked me to repeat other American names -- hilarious ones like Anjerina Jourii.

I hate Japan.

Weekend with my Japanese Homies

When asked what my weekend plans were, I replied, "I am eating. With Japanese girls."

Essentially that was precisely what I did this past Saturday and Sunday.

On Saturday, I braved my slight cold (read: I had no ability to breathe) to meet Yumi and Scott and the Honeycomb coffee shop. This is a coffee shop with cute cakes, derricious coffee beverages, and some attractive waitresses! If only I swung that way. But I'm not into waitresses.

Yumi, I should add, wanted to go back there about five times during the day. I blame LIZ for this, as she introduced me to it awhile back and I have been addicted ever since. The addiction has now been passed on.

After coffee, the three of us went to meet Miss Yuuki Shibayama for some Sushi Ro------- in Oyima. The sushi was good, but my sickness prevented me from eating a disgusting amount, as I usually do. Alas.

We ditched Scott afterwards and Yuuki drove us to a Jersey Cow dairy farm in Kumihama! They had baby cows in one pen and HUUUUUGE Jersey dairy cows in the barn. They were HUGE! I don't know why they seemed so big... either Jersey Cows are humongous or I haven't ever actually seen a cow before and I forgot. Anyway, the point is we tried salt ice cream and it was gross. So we revived our taste buds by eating blueberry yogurt ice cream was what soooo good.

After a quick glimpse of the Kumihama vegetable market and a very detailed discussion on sweet potatoes, we went back to the Mineyama area, stalked Liz from place to place, and bought me a shiny maroon bicycle! It's being delivered on Monday after school (in theory). Hooray transportation that isn't my car! Not that I have anywhere in biking distance I can go to, but damnit it's the principle of the thing.

After wandering around Mine and looking at ugly ugly shoes, we went to Seiryuu (a Japanese tavern by the train station). Yumi and Yuuki's stomachs were bottomless pits. I was thoroughly showed up by their crazy hunger.

The next day was meant to be taking Kirby-kun to the vet. However, the friendly vet said that he didn't actually know anything about ferrets and recommended a farther away different ferret-affiliated veterinarian. We did not go all the way to Fukuichiyama, however. Instead, we dropped Kirby off in Ine and drove even FARTHER and close to (in?) Fukui Prefecture. The goal, you see, was a road trip to Obama. Obama, through the ridiculousness of the Japanese kanji system, means "small beach". The name could easily be pronounced "kohama", but fortunately for my obsession with novelty, it is pronounced like our dreamy possibly presidential candidate. You know, the black one.

Obama has two mermaid statues, a public restroom, and a train station. We found no statues of Barak Obama, no ridiculous Obama-shaped cakes, and no shirts with Engrish pronouncing undying fidelity to the strange, American politician. It was sad. We DID however, find an excellent onsen! Yumi and I got nekkid and enjoyed the seaweed, vitamin, and freakishly hot baths in the onsen, drank lots of water, and hopped back in the car!

I should add that on the way to Obama (small beach), we passed Nagahama (long beach), Takahama (high beach), and Oohama (big beach).

We met Marina and Scotty at Karachi (the Indian/Pakistani curry shop in Maizuru). Quick fact about Maizuru, it means, "dancing stork". YAY! 舞鶴. Curry, as always, was magnificent.

Then it was moooore driving! Dropped Yumi off, went home, and realized that my glasses are still so broken and I have to wear contacts until I figure out how to procure more eye wear. Crap.